All posts tagged: Cerebral Palsy

365 Days, Living In The Moment: Day 236

I find myself in a weird position, caught between two worlds. Two sides of myself colliding and I have to figure out how to make it work. The artsy side of myself who would love it to express it self in different mediums and live in a space where being creative is encouraged and sought after. And the practical side of myself, who needs to figure out how to keep working, while also paying attention to my body and what it needs; while trying not to neglect my mind and in my heart. Many times I have thought the answer would just make it self clear, and sometimes it does but, I have a funny feeling, this time will be up to me. Do I do the same thing, or jump in with both feet and try to make it work. It’s hard to know when your heart is in one place but your mind is in another. You know if you could make one work the other would be easier. I can make money …

365 Days, Living In The Moment: Day 235

Today was… An interesting day to say the least. I had it in my hand that I was going to do everything in the morning so that I could spend the rest of the day lying on the couch doing nothing. This meant I was rushing around like a chicken with my head cut off, but I actually got everything done. In 45 minutes I was able to shower, get something cooked for me, and fold and put away laundry. I won’t be doing this every single Sunday but as I just realized that I don’t have a free Saturday until basically the end of February this is good to know. Trying to figure out the balance between work and life is so hard and I want to do everything that it’s on my calendar I just don’t know if I’m going to have the spoons to do it all I will make it happen but how I don’t know. Hence, living in the moment. When I tell people how busy I am I often …

365 Days, Living In The Moment: Day 232

I left this morning at 6:30 AM I came back this evening at 8:30 PM. My muscles are so tight and contracted even when I try to relax them I can’t. And I was sitting all that time. Don’t get me wrong today was a really good day. I mean work was work, but I was able to get my nails done and pamper myself a little bit in. Which you know, if you know me, getting my nails done and a couple other things at the spa once a month is part of my mental health/self-care routine. If it all went away tomorrow I could definitely deal with it. Believe me, I have thought about cutting it out. But then I’ve had people in my life, even my mom, tell me not to. Even saying/typing that, is really hard for me, because I know that money could be going to something else and I know I still struggle with feeling worthy of the time, attention, and care, that is paid to you at the …

365 Days, Living In The Moment: Day 221

I have been having a lot of conversations lately with people about mobility. Before I continue, I must warn you this may be a controversial blog post. These are my views and my opinion, if you have a different opinion please feel free to Voice that opinion and I respectful manner and we can have a conversation about it. One thing I do not want is for people’s views to be brought down or attacked due to this post as I know we can all have varying opinions For various reasons so please keep the comments respectful thank you. As I was saying, I have been having a few conversations with people about mobility and if/when is the right time to start different treatments or in some peoples cases to stop using a certain type of mobility aid and start using a different one. The conclusion I have come to is that it really depends on the person. That said, I can see how parents of people with disabilities may feel that the person should …

365 Days, Living In The Moment: Day 210

As I look back on today the work part, professional Mindy did nothing remarkable really. In the taking care of business, personal Mindy, she got it together today. Now I’m going to stop talking about myself in the second person, and say, today I feel like great strides were made, I finally feel somewhat on top of several different situations going on in life that I have needed to get a hold of for a while. To finally feel in control of something, after not having control of it for a long time, I can’t describe the feeling. I also found myself being conscious of my needs yet resource full with what I have. The last and one of the most noticeable shifts in my thinking has come gradually over the past few months but I certainly noticed it today. I don’t deny any more that I like and in many ways I need to (I hate using those words in this context) because I feel like some of this is a luxury, I get …

365 Days, Living In The Moment: Day 209

As I sit here after eating dinner and hour later than I had hoped I have to pat myself on the back. I was supposed to be picked up from work today by the accessible transit Service and after waiting a few minutes I called to see if they were running late. In fact, they were and the operator told me it would be about 20 to 30 minutes. As I went back into my building and began to text a friend, telling her about the situation I stopped midsentence – mid text and realized, I have no control over this and neither does anybody who I would tell about it so knowing that I have no control over me I should just let it be. And within that I found the driver came in 10 minutes or so. Are year ago I would not have thought this way. Or year ago I would be a grumpy mess yammering about this situation to my friends for the next week. As if it was the worst …

365 Days, Living In The Moment: Day 200

Wow 200 days! I can’t believe I have made it this far. I really didn’t think I’d make it even past week. Honestly this challenge has truly become part of my life and changed how I look at things. Years ago I was a ball of stress, never even able to take a breath when talking to someone. Now – well someone describe me as very chill. And I am. To say I don’t let the little things get to me would be a lie, because everyone has their days. I had one yesterday in fact. But often I am able to put the little things into perspective, and even the big things don’t seem life ending or life-changing, Unless of course they are. 200 days is a mile stone, but there are so many fun things to come, knowing about a few of them and not knowing about many of them I can say for certain, this is going to be a fun life changing year and continuing this journey and creating the next …

365 Days, Living In The Moment: Day 196

Happy international day of persons with disabilities everyone. In the spirit of today I was going to make a video, but I thought twice only because I don’t have the energy required to make a video editing video and post a video. So, I thought I would blog instead. I don’t want this to be a negative posts so I am going to focus on the positive, which is what I do most days, and thankfully there is at least some I can talk about. I have spoken before about purpose. Quite honestly, I probably do it a lot. At this point in my life, purpose is what drives me, I don’t know if that would be different if I was “able-bodied”but I know I have always been looking for the why behind a thing. I think this is why floundering is so hard for me, I have a hard time letting things go. Especially if I know what you can do them. let me do them in my own way, but I know not …

365 Days, Living In The Moment: Day 195

So, I was able to slow things down today and in the slowing down I was able to get more done. Funny how that works. I think, and I’m just thinking out loud here, literally, voice recognition is a wonderful thing. I wonder if as a person Who is disabled I am always trying to prove myself. And, speed is often something people are looking for, so, it’s something that I have learned operate in. So much so, when I needed to slow down I have a harder time. But, I as a disabled person I am able to have, and take, the luxury of time because often speed is not a choice for me. I operate on Mindy time and sometimes that time cannot be changed. If you can’t handle that, I’m sorry, but you’re never gonna get me. what I have struggled with over the years is realizing that it is OK to take that time. It is not a weakness, in fact it is the Strank’s. I am deserving of that time, …